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    Home Unlabelled Crusader Kings so i seem to be playing a dynasty of irish dudes that cant stop accidentally walking into ridiculous positions of power, just because they're nice guys or something idk

    Crusader Kings so i seem to be playing a dynasty of irish dudes that cant stop accidentally walking into ridiculous positions of power, just because they're nice guys or something idk

    December 04, 2021

    Crusader Kings so i seem to be playing a dynasty of irish dudes that cant stop accidentally walking into ridiculous positions of power, just because they're nice guys or something idk

    so i seem to be playing a dynasty of irish dudes that cant stop accidentally walking into ridiculous positions of power, just because they're nice guys or something idk

    Posted: 03 Dec 2021 04:23 PM PST

    i made a post about my tutorial experience here already but i'll include it so you get the full story:

    • be donal mac malachy, absolutely random irish knight with no land and no connections

    • be appointed as beneficiary in the holy war by then-queen beatrice of ireland because he just seems like a nice guy and also the player had no idea what that was for and wanted to move on

    • aight, not like anythings gonna happen lol

    • queen bea sends all she's got to the holy land, about 1700 men. they siege a castle down the south end of the arena because everyone fucking else is on the north side of the war around damascus so surely nobody's gonna pay attention to the tiny army alone on the south

    • wrong, 6000 enemies come before they're even halfway done sieging and kick them out because i wasn't paying attention to them and couldn't retreat them in time

    • they go home to ireland so queen beatrice did fuck all in the war and it ends before they even get back on irish shores

    • random irish knight is appointed king of jerusalem

    • haha cool. wait what

    • you, random irish knight, are appointed king of jerusalem. cause you seem like a nice guy :)

    • wtf

    • ok

    • the king of jerusalem is irish

    • surrounded by shit vassals and islamic rulers that hate me

    • spend most of my time trying not to die, swear fealty to holy roman empire, ally with byzantine empire and a bunch of other major players to discourage islamic rulers that hate me from declaring war

    • slowly and carefully expand territory to not piss off my already pissed-off populace and invest a lot of time into making them not hate me

    • queen beatrice is my lifelong friend throughout all of this. very sweet but also whenever i try to one-up her she always pulls out the "i made you king of jerusalem" card which is a bit unfair

    • bea's companionship isn't enough, smoke a fuckton of weed to deal with the stress

    • actually works out, everyone (except the islamic rulers) likes me because i'm a nice guy :)

    • take a final puff of dank kush and then die knowing that i did a good job. somehow

    :)

    • be christopher mac donal, son of the Accidental King

    • continue where my father left off, expanding jerusalem a bit further, doing my part for my allies in their wars, not as knowledgeable militarily as my dad but a far better diplomat and all-around nice guy as well

    • dad's territory is split between me and my brother who becomes my vassal, but it's cool because he likes me cause i'm a nice guy. we get along fine

    • holy roman empire's constantly infighting and my liege is constantly changing, leading to this election thing always happening. i right click it away because i'm not an elector, nobody's voting for me anyway, and i have other things to think about

    • not like anything's gonna happen lol :)

    • make even more allies than my dad and have a fuckton of children

    • first one is a female fornicator

    • second one is male but dies at age 7

    • third one seems good, educate him well and give him a good arranged marriage

    • he FUCKS MY WIFE

    • HE FUCKS HIS OWN GODDAMN MOTHER

    • SHE SAYS SHE LOVES HIM MORE THAN ME

    • jail him, disinherit, divorce wife and get a new french one

    • seduce, romance, please dont fucking fuck our children

    • know she's the one cause she smokes weed like my dad did

    • pray to fuck my next son in line is normal

    • new holy war! the thing that somehow made my dad (and in turn, me) king of jerusalem!

    • hell yeah let's do it i got allies and a big army this time baby

    • lose

    • oh well, lightning never strikes the same place tw-

    • my liege the holy roman emperor dies and i am voted into taking his place

    • lol again? whatever -- wait what

    • the holy roman emperor dies and i am voted into taking his place. cause i seem like a nice guy. :)

    • wtf

    • ok

    • the emperor of the holy roman empire is irish

    • old mac donal had a kingdom eieio and that was honestly good enough for him man why'd you--

    • i'll just do what my dad did, accept this, and move on

    • my son (not the wifefucking one) is not next in line to succeed me for the whole empire, he's behind some guy called prince heinrich which is fine, my son can just deal with jerusalem when it's his turn to rule

    • now have 20 something vassals a billion miles away that ive never talked to

    • immediately like 3 factions rise up against me, including one lead by prince heinrich. he sends me death threats before the year's even over and demands that i hand over the crown. he has the support of basically all my new vassals.

    • which is not ideal but hey my son's next in line now! silver linings!

    • am very tempted to just be like "aight here u go bro" and hand the HRE to heinrich

    • power corrupts

    • i have become a maniac within less than a year of having this

    • old mac donal has a new crown and he likes it

    • i get the feeling my heir is somewhat concerned.

    • civil war

    • at first it's just my 7,000 men + mercenaries against 24,000

    • unfortunately, i am a nice guy :)

    • call up all my fucking allies

    • hungary, ireland, wales, lusatia, pomerania, polotsk, the aegean islands, a tiny fucking town in italy

    • fucking world war 0

    • gather up enough men to make the balance of power dead fucking even

    • rally army in north of the HRE and start sieging the shit out of everything there

    • send mercenaries from jerusalem to attack the south

    • marry off children faster than my first son died to gain more allies

    • ransom every single captured enemy that i can to buy more mercenaries

    • IT'S ACTUALLY GOING NOT AWFUL

    • my son is basically tommen from game of thrones rn. i raised him too well. there's not a bad bone in his body. he has 0 fucking intrigue

    • but being a nice guy is what got us here so maybe that's not a bad thing.

    anyway yeah that's how i spent 8 hours of my life yesterday how are you guys doing

    submitted by /u/spookyb0ss
    [link] [comments]

    I've never seen so many stress traits on one man

    Posted: 03 Dec 2021 01:19 PM PST

    Today I learned that you can reform HRE as Coptic Ethiopian. Funny thing is, you can't reform it as an Orthodox ruler, and probably any other non-catholic/coptic christian faith.

    Posted: 04 Dec 2021 12:13 AM PST

    I finally did it. I've never felt so happy. 7 attempts, 5 hours in total, much pain, but I did it.

    Posted: 03 Dec 2021 07:15 PM PST

    That cheating harlot! How could she?

    Posted: 03 Dec 2021 12:17 PM PST

    So how many times do you want to create Israel?... My character: "Yes"

    Posted: 03 Dec 2021 09:19 PM PST

    I found Uran, and he is fucking terrifying

    Posted: 04 Dec 2021 03:06 AM PST

    500yrs of controlled inbred has brought me this...

    Posted: 04 Dec 2021 03:01 AM PST

    High King Haesteinn of the Southern Baltic Empire

    Posted: 03 Dec 2021 11:30 PM PST

    I somehow managed to injure my dead ex-wife on a hunting trip....

    Posted: 03 Dec 2021 03:35 PM PST

    I somehow managed to injure my dead ex-wife on a hunting trip....

    My wife died under mysterious circumstances 10 days ago. What a shame btw. No idea how that happened! So I decided to take a hunting trip to ease some of the stress I had just built up from the tragic death of my soulmate. And I really wasn't paying close attention to what was happening and just choosing the best outcomes on the fly and behold I had somehow managed to injure my dead and buried wife on the trip. Note that the date of the injury is the 21st of September and that my wife died on the 11th of September.

    ​

    ​

    I can't decide if landing an arrow shot on someone who is dead and buried is the best shot in the world or the worst one lol

    https://preview.redd.it/1g03juczxe381.png?width=1920&format=png&auto=webp&s=78d9b1c61a4a4a162bb0d39b4f370bdeb6758d0a

    submitted by /u/King_Coyote_Starrk
    [link] [comments]

    When you don't play in Europe

    Posted: 03 Dec 2021 06:16 PM PST

    Who gave me this absolute god of a man

    Posted: 04 Dec 2021 01:07 AM PST

    Anyone ever just play a loyal count?

    Posted: 04 Dec 2021 02:30 AM PST

    I have gotten tired of all the rags to riches games I play, so I plan on playing a CK3 game where I start as a count and just be loyal to whoever is my liege and serve them the best I can with no ambitions to reach a higher level.

    Just curious if anyone else has done this.

    submitted by /u/SomeRandomIrishGuy
    [link] [comments]

    What a way to die

    Posted: 04 Dec 2021 03:48 AM PST

    Big blob Bhutan, united under the sole purpose of fixing the world's border gore

    Posted: 03 Dec 2021 02:18 PM PST

    Rare Hamilton event

    Posted: 03 Dec 2021 01:57 PM PST

    Il Papa

    Posted: 03 Dec 2021 03:52 PM PST

    help, some immortal guy is coming to kill me for being immortal

    Posted: 03 Dec 2021 11:18 PM PST

    so my character is now the immortal godly emperor of Tibet but I recently got a event thing that said that some guy evil torturer called "Uran the immortal" is on his way to kill me. What do I do in this situation, my only heirs are two 5 year old girls and I don't want to lose my gains.

    submitted by /u/rwandahero7123
    [link] [comments]

    It's all a part of his master plan

    Posted: 03 Dec 2021 03:36 PM PST

    Ah yes, the greatest stress reliever of them all, VEAL.

    Posted: 03 Dec 2021 09:22 PM PST
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